Lily Allen Admits ‘Red Flag’ Past as David Harbour Moves On After Split

Lily Allen has opened up about a toxic pattern in her past relationships, just weeks after news broke of her split from “Stranger Things” star David Harbour.

In a recent episode of her Miss Me? podcast, the 39-year-old singer reflected on her history of codependent behavior, admitting that she once placed all her emotional dependency on a single person—a major relationship red flag.

Her confession comes at a time when her marriage to Harbour has crumbled, sparking speculation that these past relationship struggles may have played a role in their recent breakup.

During the podcast, Allen recalled how her approach to intimacy changed drastically when she got into her first serious relationship.

"It’s funny because I think I was a tactile kid, but as soon as I got my first boyfriend, Lester, complete transference of intimacy," she shared.

She described how, after entering the relationship, she no longer wanted to be hugged or kissed by her family—as if all of her emotional attachment had shifted to this one person.

"Not only did I not want to touch or be cuddled or be kissed by anyone in my family, I couldn’t engage in it with them either. It was like, this person is where I’ve put that now," she admitted.

Allen went on to acknowledge that this behavior was far from healthy, calling it “incredibly red flag, codependent behavior.”

Her co-host and longtime friend, Miquita Oliver, chimed in, suggesting that Allen may have been reacting to having a “safe male figure” in her life—something that, at the time, likely made her feel over the moon.

Allen agreed, though she seemed uncertain. “Yeah… maybe,” she responded.

Allen’s revelation about her unhealthy attachment patterns comes in the wake of her high-profile split from David Harbour, whom she married in September 2020.

Rumors of trouble in their marriage had been circulating for months, with insiders confirming the breakup to People on February 3, 2025.

"Her marriage has been crumbling, and they have split," a source stated.

It seems Allen had been struggling emotionally for a while, even before the public learned of her separation from Harbour.

Back in January 2025, during an earlier episode of her podcast, she hinted at personal turmoil, telling Oliver:

"I know I’ve been talking about it for months, but I’ve been spiraling and spiraling. It’s got out of control. I’ve tried."

By early 2025, the rumors gained traction when Allen was allegedly spotted on the celebrity dating app Raya, sparking speculation that she and Harbour had already called it quits.

Since the split, Allen has checked into a treatment center for “emotional turmoil”, signaling that the breakup has taken a serious toll on her mental health.

Meanwhile, Harbour seems to be moving on quickly. The Stranger Things actor has been linked to 27-year-old aspiring model Ellie Fallon, sparking further media frenzy about his post-divorce love life.

Despite the emotional toll of her split, Allen is continuing to focus on herself, her career, and her daughters, Ethel, 13, and Marnie, 12, whom she shares with ex-husband Sam Cooper.

Whether her past patterns of emotional dependency played a role in her marriage’s downfall remains uncertain, but her raw honesty about her struggles paints a picture of someone trying to learn from their past.

As for Harbour, with a new rumored romance already in the headlines, it seems he’s ready to put his marriage to Allen in the rearview mirror.